Copyright © 2022 Lee Spirit 

One of the best things to do when you’re feeling overwhelmed by life and circumstance is to head outside into beautiful nature. Even better if you have access to some beautiful mountain ranges like this one. Nature is spacious and vast, so there is plenty of room to let go of unwanted emotions, frustrations, angers, and resentments. There is also plenty of space to feel that release, and then invite new, positive energies in! It’s a great place for holding space for ourselves.

It would be nice if we all felt like sunshine and rainbows all the time, but it’s just not a reality to be happy and cheerful all the time. If your life is easy now, it will be harder later, and if your life is hard now, it will be easier later. The truth is there is great suffering in our world, internally and externally. It’s hard on the heart. So how we can heal that hardness is through holding space for ourselves and others with our unconditional love.

What Does It Mean To Hold Space For Someone?

Think about a time when you have felt at your worst – whether due to a physical illness, or just feeling mentally drained, exhausted or depressed. Some of you may like a lot of extra attention in those times, and others may retreat to their Hermit-Hidey-Hole. You may not want to interact with anyone for days, maybe weeks. Whatever the case may be, it’s always a blessing to have that one special friend or family member you can count on to be there for you in your time of need. Alternatively, they might simply hold space for you while you retreat for a while.

Being A Safe Container

Holding space means being a safe container for yourself or another – Safe, meaning no judgement, no criticism about how you/they feel – Just being with what is and allowing them to be exactly as they are. If they want to be silent for a month and a half, allow that without taking it personally. Have empathy for your own, or their predicament. Through compassion, kindness, and unconditional love, they will heal, and you will heal too.

Being a Good Listener

When we offer a safe container for someone, we are really listening to what they are saying, even if what they are saying is through silence, or tears. Silence can speak volumes, and if we give ourselves and others the compassion to truly understand, then we are doing our best to be a good, empathetic listener. We aren’t trying to argue, react, or even respond, but to just be there for them.

Holding Space By Making Someone Feel Like a Million Bucks

Sometimes we say or do the stupidest things, and we hurt others with our words or actions. It’s hard enough to forgive ourselves for what we’ve done. Forgiving someone else who has wronged us might be even trickier. The thing is that forgiveness is very freeing. When you are holding space for another, you are forgiving whatever they’ve done to you or someone else. This makes them feel like they deserve respect, attention, and care.

We all make mistakes, so wouldn’t you want someone to hold space for you unconditionally too? Like a loving mother who will always support you no matter what. When you make someone feel deserving of your love, you make them feel like a million bucks. In doing so, you give them a safe space to heal.

Don’t Make It All About You

One of the traps we can easily fall into is listening to what someone is going through, and suddenly being reminded of our own suffering and problems. Then we start talking about ourselves and our own problems instead of listening deeply to the other. Make it all about them, not you, and they will feel truly seen and heard. Your problems are not more important than theirs when you’re holding space for them.

Holding Space Means Not Trying to Change or Fix Anything

It’s normal to want to offer a solution to someone who is suffering, but resist the urge to change or fix. This will only make them feel more broken. As Michael Brown says in his book, “The Presence Process”, “the way out is through”. If you allow them to feel what they feel, let the tears and anger out, then you offer a safe space for their the pain to pass through them. Ultimately this leads to their healing.

Holding Space For Yourself and Others As We Approach Winter Solstice

We are just getting into December here, but as the holiday season gets underway, as well as Winter Solstice, it’s a good idea to remember self-care. When we take care of ourselves, we can better take care of those around us. Holding space becomes much easier when we are loving ourselves unconditionally.

Click Here To Heal Your Inner Child When You Feel Over-sensitive

Some self-care things to do as we approach the Winter Solstice and the holidays…

• Light some candles and incense to bring more light and warmth into your heart.
• Take a social media break, and turn off the TV and your phone for a while.
• Sit or walk outside in the mountains, a park, or anywhere in nature.
• Use all your senses to be present in the moment.
• Immerse yourself in some healing waters in the bath or a spa.

As mentioned, doing some of these self-care activities can really help you hold space for yourself so you can show up better for everyone else. Loving ourselves unconditionally means we can love others unconditionally, and that unconditional love allows a perfectly safe space to heal our wounds. Healing ourselves, we can also heal others. Heart magic!

Lee Spirit is an avid outdoors adventurer with a love for nature, photography, health & fitness, wellness, and spirituality. She helps those who suffer from anxiety & negative thinking to become healthier in mind-body-spirit. Her own personal journey has led her to the  study and practice of mindfulness, health, wellness, yoga, spirituality, sound healing, meditation, and personal development for over 20 years. Get mindfulness, meditation, and personal development tips in her Free Natural Mind Healing Report.